Chapter 2: Determination 1

"Kuromine-kun, do you want another cup of rice?"

"......"

"Kuromine-kun?"

"Riku. What are you spacing out for?"

A sudden jolt strikes my left shoulder. It seems Kana poked me with her elbow.

Thanks to that, my consciousness returns back to reality. I had been lost in thought during the meal, leaving me look absentmindedly to others.

Currently, we are having dinner in the living room after being invited inside. Kana and I were served croquettes, boiled spinach, and salad - a menu that feels familiar from the times I spent at the Hoshimiya's place.

"Do you want another rice, Kuromine-kun?"

"...No, thank you."

"Oh, okay. Don't hesitate to ask if you change your mind."

Hoshimiya smiles genuinely with no hint of suspicion. Her kindness is hard for me to handle right now.

It feels like tiny needles are stabbing my heart.

"Riku-kun, are you okay?"

A kind-looking elderly woman sitting in front of me asked me. She looks at me with her unclear eyesight, wearing a soft smile, deepening the wrinkles on her face. Her name is Soeda-san. She lost her husband a few years ago and had been living alone until she took care of Hoshimiya. She mentioned a while ago that she used to live in the city when she was young but moved to the countryside after turning sixty. "I'm fine," I said to Soeda-san and nodded.

"Oh, I see. Do you want second serving?"

"...Then, please."

"Hey, Soeda-san, it seems like you're forcing him to have more."

"That's strange. Even though he looks like he's hungry."

What kind of face am I making? Actually, I don't have much appetite right now.

I chuckled at Soeda-san's easygoing and seemingly airheaded nature.

Reluctantly, I handed Hoshimiya a rice bowl, placing it beside the rice cooker.

While Hoshimiya serve me a rice, I recalled what happened right after I came to this house.

◆◆◆

"Um, nice to meet you...? Are you Kana's boyfriend?"

"Huh? Really, Ayana? What are you talking about? That's way too cruel as a joke."

"...What do you mean?"

"Ayana...!"

Kana widened her eyes, while looking at Hoshimiya. She seemed bewildered, tilting her head in confusion as if her thoughts had stopped.

Next, was my turn to speak.

"I'm Kuromine Riku, we're classmates."

"Huh? Really!? No way... I'm so sorry!"

"Don't worry about it. I don't have much presence, so it's fine if you don't remember me."

I replied with a light laugh, while Hoshimiya immediately bowing her head.

It was strange how calmly I handle the situation.

"Forgetting a classmate is pretty bad... I'm sorry."

"You really don't have to worry about it. Lift your head, please."

"I'm really sorry..."

Even though she raised her head, Hoshimiya's expression didn't brighten.

There was a slightly heavy atmosphere, but Hoshimiya mustered up courage to ask me.

"Um, I understand why Kana came... but why did you come too, Kuromine-kun?"

"I came as a representative from the boys. Hoshimiya, you were sick, right?"

"Yeah. I suddenly had a high fever, and my heart was affected too... But as you can see, I'm feeling better now. I plan to go to school after summer vacation."

"I see. I heard a rumor that you might quit school, so I was worried."

"Quit...? Oh, no. I'm fine. Wait, that rumor is going around? I'll explain the situation I guess when I go back to school, so don't worry."

Perhaps trying to show her well-being, Hoshimiya smiled brightly.

...I see, so it happened again. Altering her memories.

"I'm sorry, but can I stay here for the night too? It's strange request to make suddenly, though."

"Well, having a boy stay over... requires some mental preparation, you know..."

"Actually, I don't have money for the train fare back. If I can't find to stay tonight, I'll end up sleeping on the streets and take several days to get back home while camping outdoors."

"That's so unprepared, Kuromine-kun... Well, okay. I'll talk to Soeda-san. I think she'll be okay with it."

"Soeda-san?"

"Yeah, she's the person taking care of me."

Hoshimiya blushed slightly and explained.

"Alright, then I'll talk to Soeda-san, so just wait a little bit."

As if there were no problems, Hoshimiya quickly gone back to the house.

Kana, who had been standing there in a daze, suddenly regained her senses and came closer to me.

"W-Wait, Riku! What... what's going on!?"

"Memory alteration. I explained it earlier, right?"

"You did!! But Ayana's forgotten about the accident-related stuff—"

"Why do you think she forgot about it?"

"That's because... it was too painful, and her heart couldn't bear it... right?"

"Exactly. So, if there's something she can't bear, she may forget things other than the accident."

"No way... I mean... no, that can't be true!"

Upon hearing my explanation, Kana becomes visibly agitated, taking a few deep breaths to compose herself before asking me anxiously.

"Riku, are you okay?"

"Do I look okay?"

"Yeah...? You seem so composed to me. You even improvised to match Ayana's story. As for me... I couldn't think anything. I couldn't tell if it was real or not... I was just stunned."

"I feel the same."

"Eh.....!"

There's one difference between Me and Kana.

It's mental preparation.

It's always like this...

When everything seems to be going smoothly, fate doesn't let me walk on the happy path without any obstacles.

Something unexpected is bound to happen.

People's reactions depends on whether they understand and accept that fact.

At least Hoshimiya is living in a environment where she can smile.

That alone comforts me...

"This is... just too painful."

"For now, let's go along with Hoshimiya. We don't know what might happen if we inadvertently trigger her past memories."

"...........Yeah."

"First, let's confirm the situation and organize everything. We can think about what to do next. After that,"

"You're amazing, Riku. You're so composed."

"I'm just... trying to act calm."

If I loosen the rope that binds my emotions even just a little, I could start crying and throw everything right away.

After all, Humans are born weak....

◆◆◆

"Here, Kuromine-kun."

"Thank you."

I received the bowl from Hoshimiya and looked at the piled-up rice.

Faint steam rose, and I could see each grain of rice plumply cooked.

"Riku-kun, you can stay here as long as you want. I also have some clothes of Tapei-san's, so don't worry."

Tapei-san... was the name of the late husband of Soeda-san.

"Thank you. I appreciate your kindness."

I bowed politely and expressed my gratitude. Soeda-san is truly a kind person. She accepted me without showing any signs of inconvenience, even though I suddenly showed up. However, I should remain a bit more cautious.

"By the way, Riku-kun, are you dating Ayana-chan?"

"Huh?"

"Soeda-san!? Why are you asking all of a sudden!? We're not dating!"

While I stood there with my mouth half-open, Hoshimiya's face turned bright red in anger.

Soeda-san calmly nodded multiple times without being bothered.

"I see, I see. It's strange, you know. The way Riku-kun looks at Ayana-chan is similar to how Tapei-san used to look at me."

"───!"

Hoshimiya, who had become silent, glanced at me.

When our eyes met, she quickly averted her gaze and lowered her eyes.

"...Soeda-san, please don't say strange things. It'll make things awkward between us."

Hoshimiya expressed her disapproval with a faint, mosquito-like voice, showing her innocent side. Even so, Soeda-san's calm expression remained unchanged.

"I'm sorry, Ayana-chan."

"No... Please be careful next time..."

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be careful. By the way, Riku-kun and Ayana-chan, are you dating?"

"Soeda-san!?"

Soeda-san might be quite old now.

◆◆◆

The room given to me was a six-tatami mat room on the second floor.

It seemed unused on a regular basis, as there was nothing else except for a futon. It felt very plain.

I think Riku's assigned room on the second floor was also similar.

When I opened the window, the night breeze flowed in, and I could hear the chirping of insects from the nearby forest.

*Hoo-hoo... Hohho...*

Among the sounds of nature, I could even hear the hooting sound of an own here...

"It's way too rural here..... Eek, a bug!"

A few insects smaller than my fingertips flew in, so I quickly closed the window.

The intruding bugs buzzed with an unpleasant fluttering sound and gathered around the light bulb.

Sitting down, feeling down while looking up at them, I started thinking about Riku and Ayana.

What can I do for them?

The more I know and the more the situation progresses, the more I realize there's nothing I can do. Especially when I try to imagine Riku's feelings, it tightens my heart painfully.

It's just too painful. To be forgotten by someone you love...

In Riku's case, it's not just being forgotten.

Not only about the accident, but he's also separated from his childhood friend, Harukaze. After going through all of these events, Riku came to see Ayana.

And this is the result...!

'I just want to see her, to live together...'

Riku revealed his true feelings to Ayana's grandmother.

Because of his casual way of speaking, not too passionate, nor too cold, his genuine feelings and pure thoughts came across so painfully.

I feel the urge to do something, for Riku's sake, of course, and for Ayana too...

"Why did you forget about Riku, Ayana?"

I heard it from Riku himself.

"Does that mean Riku is the cause of Ayana's pain...?"

Or is she unable to bear the guilt, and that's why she's come to this point?

Due to Ayana's personality, she probably constantly blames and punishes herself relentlessly.

As a result, she might have forgotten about Riku, the source of her guilt, to protect her own heart?

"Ah! I can't figure it out no matter how much I think! I'm bad at using my brain!"

Feeling agitated, I scratch my head.

This problem really differs from the problems of a normal human beings....

Because you can't blame anyone, it becomes even more complicated.

"Their relationship has been reset... no, it's getting worse."

Anyway, I'm worried about Riku. Though he seemed calm, he looked absent-minded during dinner.

His mind is somewhere else. He's probably thinking about the same things I am.

And what lies ahead...

"Alright. Let's go to Riku."

As I vowed to be his ally, I can't just stand by and watch.

Rather than anything specific, I just want to be of help.

As I was about to get up and leave the room, the door suddenly opened, and Ayana appeared.

There will be a murder. That's what probably Haruhi's thought when in a situation like this especially in a novel. Ko-Fi below. Haruhi is from anime The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya.

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